Meet the New, Doomed to Failure Version of Congress

Happy, er, Unhappy 114th Congress inaugural day! As if the last two terrible sessions weren't bad enough, now the problem has spread- the Republicans run the whole place. Now before we completely declare the 114th Congress a failure (we'll do that at the end), it's important that we get to know some of the high/lowlights of this group.

So, here's what to know:

• Speaker Boehner will not just be opposed in tomorrow's speaker-election by former Speaker Nancy Pelosi of the Democrats, he'll also have not one, but two Republican opponents. Nine Republicans have committed to voting against the Speaker. 
• Speaking of nine, there are nine freshman Republicans in the Senate. 
• All nine of those Republicans are committed to eliminating the entire Food Stamp program.
• There will be 20 women in the new Senate, and 84 in the House, both actually are good historically.
• There will be one House Majority Whip, Rep. Steve Scalise, who spoke to a David Duke sponsored conference.
• The new Senate Armed Forces Chairman is Senator John McCain, who has called for wars in Syria, Iran, and Iraq in recent years.
• There will be two African-American Republicans, Congresswoman Mia Love and Senator Tim Scott, an improvement.
• Two African-Americans will be in the Senate as well, Senators Scott and Booker.
• There will be one climate-change denier serving as Chairman of the Senate Environmental and Public Works Committee, Senator James Inhofe of Oklahoma.
• There will be one non-lawyer, Senator Grassley, reviewing judicial and justice department nominations as chairman of the Senate Judiciary Committee.
• Banking and the Budget in the new Senate will not be overseen by experts, but by Alabama Republicans, Senators Shelby and Sessions, while Mississippi's Thad Cochran gets Appropriations. In other words, banking regulation and how we spend are money on the Senate side will be controlled by the most conservative, least productive economically, region in the country.
• Paul Ryan, rejected by America in 2012, will now chair the House Ways and Means Committee.
• The House did escape having convicted felon Congressman Grimm there tomorrow, by days.

Well, what can I say. This group of rejects in charge of passing our laws will be our new legislative branch. The 114th Congress will be a failure that spends 80% of it's time posturing, and passing laws that do more harm than good. Celebrate America, you elected these goons!